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The Great Debt Debate Panned
Theater Review, By Richard Mann

In a year full of hope for a strong revival of the Washington theater scene, Standard& Poors sadly reports that The Great Debt Debate, a musical about contemporary class warfare and political strife, simply does not live up to the hype or promise of its off-Beltway beginnings.

Citing poor direction by the President and clumsy acting by its leading stars from both sides of the aisle, renowned ratings experts Roger Standard Gene Poors gave the production two thumbs down, dropping the musical from AAA to AA+ based on what they called the opening night’s “disappointing political infighting and general childish behavior” on the part of all the actors, the production staff, and the director.

“This musical was an abomination even for the most jaded political theater-goer,” opined Mr. Standard. “In a season where the public was desperate for a performance worthy of the founding fathers to redeem the Washington theater scene, instead we were treated to the petty and childish histrionics that made Pee Wee Herman look adult. And all the songs were sadly embarrassing and forgettable.”

“I loved John Boehner in Little Bo Peep,” said Christine Kleinschmidt, outside the rotunda after the evening’s performance. “He was very convincing in his role as a young girl who had lost her sheep and didn’t know where to find them, but this play denied him the range of emotion we all know him capable of.”

Standard & Poors also cited general global unease about the declining value of the fiat currency system across the board as another cause for their lowering the musical’s rating. “It’s not just the debt debate in this country that we found wanting,” said a saddened Gene Poors. “We feel that, as the world leader of stable finance, the U.S. dollar, once revered by the world as ‘the petrodollar’, just doesn’t cut it anymore as the world’s darling act of currencies. It lacks weight and heft, not to mention stability. It would have been better if the dollar had stuck closely with gold. That break-up has resulted in a lot of very bad acting.”

Finally, Roger Standard sighed as he reflected, “The Great Debt Debate was a really good topic for a musical to address, however the script and the production simply failed to deliver.”

“I don’t know”, remarked Miss Kleinschmidt, leaving the theater, “ the performance just left me feeling like, well…like we are all just…ya know…doomed.”
Most critics would agree.